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We made love a couple times but she seemed restrained, withdrawn.Finally she sat me down and told me she didn't want to be with me anymore. She was in her 30's and wanted to have children, and frankly, she missed sex with men. I had a few fake penises in my collection for my lovers (I hate the stupid-looking things), and I told her we could adopt, or perhaps go for in vitro fertilization? She said perhaps, and went home.We didn't talk for a week. Finally I confronted her one night out back of her workplace, in the darkened and empty parking lot. I told her I wanted her back...I would do anything! She told me to leave her alone. I yelled at her...She told me I disgusted her. I lost it, running at her and wrapping my hands around her neck...I had killed her! No!!I looked around quickly, wild-eyed. Nobody was there. People shout all the time in the city, so we didn't attract any attention, and my sudden throttling attack had silenced her. I ran away, crying, leaving the love. "After High School Julie decided to enroll in a beauty school and learncosmetology. She thought if she learned to do makeup and hair she couldget a job in the movie industry, which was a big employer in our town.One day after a "Girl Band" practice in the garage of one of the girls,Julie said to me "You have such pretty features; you should let me makeyou up." I replied that that was just too weird but Julie persisted andargued that she needed the practice and reminded me once again that Iowed her. Then without me ever agreeing to it Julie got her makeup kitout of the car and led me to bedroom of the girl who lived there.Julie applied a lot of conceder and foundation to hide what little beardI had and then applied the eye shadow, mascara, blush and bright redlipstick. When she was finished all the girls made a big fuss over howgood I looked. I had to agree that I did look like an especiallyattractive girl except for my hair. It was a mistake to have said thatbecause Julie said, "Not.
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